Why do people always compare their breakups with someone everyone else’s?
I hate people that justify their breakups. It’s not only the heterosexuals that do that, but it’s also the LGBTQIA+ community that does it. Maybe it’s human nature to up one each other and say that we hurt more than the other. I don’t know. I don’t care. Stop comparing my break up with yours.
“My break up was worse than yours because I knew her longer.” Really?
It doesn’t matter that my relationship was a month old, or the last one was six months long, or even that my first one was nine of hell. They were my breakups. Why should I justify how long my relationship was for it to be okay with others that I had my heart broken yet again? I went through the same, the courtship, the getting to know each other. We had our fights; we even had our reconciliations. We had planned to get married at some point in the future. Time has no relevance in a relationship.
“I’m straight so our relationship was real.” Is it 1965?
When did having homophobia mean that you’re real? Aren’t we all human and deserve to be loved, treated with respect and above all have feelings. Just because homophobes think that the LGBTQIA+ community ride unicorns over rainbows doesn’t mean we don’t have feelings. My relationship was real. I felt it; he felt it. I felt like I was in the heavens, floating on the clouds and enjoying the rays of his love as the sun rays. I felt his words cut deep into my heart, making me wiggle in pain. I feel his absence as I miss the rain in the middle of the summer in the desert. It was real to me.
“You only knew your man for six months. I knew my husband for twelve years.”
If he left you after twelve years, there must’ve been something else going on. It takes two to make a relationship. It also takes two to destroy one. I may have known him for six months, but it was a relationship. We spent time together, we did things together. If it was six months of daily bliss or was it twelve years of one day a month bliss. Why would you compare time periods? How ignorant are we?
“You’re gay it doesn’t count.”
Yes. I’m gay. And Yes, it counts. I am still human and still have feelings. The women I know have actually said this to me. I’m their best friend when it comes to shopping, looking for a good mate or for that matter to listen to them cry about their failed relationships. However, because I’m gay It doesn’t count. I don’t understand that. Are we the gays really a third race?
“He was my first, you’ve already slept with hundreds of men.”
Lies. He wasn’t your first. He was your hundredth and one. Even if I did sleep with over a hundred men, that’s a hundred frogs, toads, salamanders I had to kiss to find my true love. I know I might have to kiss another hundred before I find him. But don’t lie to me and say that I’ve slept with the football team. Now that’s an idea. I digress. Who’ve I’ve slept with in the past is not a measuring tool to how I feel about the man I just broke up with.
As far as I know, a relationship is between two people. Regardless of the sexes. Whether your LGBTQIA+ or heterosexual. A break up is a very personal thing. We went through the trouble of meeting him, getting to know him, meeting his parents, and friend. We have gone through the time of fixing dinners, planning dates, having sex. As lovers, we exchanged gifts, promises of marriage (I still wear his promise ring), and we have loved to no end. When you compare your breakup to mine, it shows me that you had nothing to give and therefore you’re broken.
