when i read “shelter me” by judy shine-logan

Shelter Me describes two women who are going through some tough times. One is a battered woman. The other a widow. Their lives intertwine in such a way that they help each other out. They have a friendship that goes beyond just friends. They become each other’s lifeline.

I am using her own words from her website to describe the book. I can’t do her justice. It’s her voice that shines in the book.

judy-shine-loganSHELTER ME intertwines the tribulations of young versus old, love verses dependency, good losses versus bad when two women are thrown into a friendship by events beyond their control. They teach each other to empower their own lives, leave the past behind and embrace their own new future. This novel explores polar-opposite traumas: widowhood, and spousal abuse – topics often explored singularly. Here, the author tells of her characters’ pain and grief and how they help each other on the road to a stable life. Shelter Me should be required reading for all professionals who work with victims of domestic violence and their families. It will serve as an inspiration to those who suffer from such violence as well.”

When I go to her book signing here in Las Vegas, I am amazed by the turnout of people that come to hear her talk about domestic abuse and widowhood. She is the Widows’ Voice. The sad part of being a widow is the other women treat you like it was your fault. There is no respect or empathy for widows. No one realizes that they’ve lost someone and have to start over with their lives.

When I read Shelter Me by Judy Shine-Logan I realized that this book has to be read by the entire world. Not only the heterosexuals. The LGBTQIA+ community should also read this book. Whether you are going through domestic violence or know someone that is, you should get this book. I also see how many LGBTQIA+ people buy her book. It also applies to our community. Some of us have gone through domestic abuse and are embarrassed because we are raised as men and something like this would never happen to a man.

When I was younger, I met a man. Not just any man. He was a good man and he was the “Wife” of another man. That’s what he called himself. The Wife. Because his “Husband” (remember this was decades before Marriage Equality) worked and made very good money. He would stay at home and be a housewife. Except that he didn’t do anything of such: They had a cook, a housekeeper, a gardener, and he didn’t have to lift a finger.

When his husband died, he was devastated. He didn’t have a bank account so he couldn’t pay for anything. Couldn’t put gas in the car, not that he needed to, he didn’t have a license. The only thing that saved him was that his husband’s family loved him. They helped him get back on his feet. Something that you hardly ever heard of back then. He became a widow (yes, I said widow. He was the “Wife.”)