Yes. I’m seeking a Long Term Relationship. Where exactly do you find one at 45? I’m either too old for the hot young guys or I’m too young for the old guys. Am I at that age where it’s between two worlds. Not only that. I’m 45, and yet I look like I’m in my early 30’s. It’s a blessing and a curse. I have the young boys wanting to date me because they think I have the money to support them. Or I’m coveted by the older gentlemen who want me for my body. I don’t have the best body in the world, but I’m also not that ugly. I’m still handsome and cute. So where do you find someone that you can spend your time with and not be coveted for your body or your money?

At a bar?

I don’t have the time to go to the bars and scope one out. There’s a saying in Spanish. “En la barra lo encuentras, en la barra lo dejas.” And I think it’s true. “You found him at the bar and you’ll dump him at the bar.” Maybe not just the bar, but the bathhouse, the swingers club, the park, the bookstore, you get my drift.

At work?

Do you really want to spend the office hours with someone you broke up with? Do you date your client, your boss, your UPS delivery guy? Who at work do you want to date? Both of you will have nothing to talk about at home. Not only that but If I dated someone from work my options would be very limited.  I actually tried it. I dated a client of mine and it did not go well. He’s no longer my client and his wife still doesn’t know. (I did not know he was married.) Another client tried his hardest to get me into bed; because I wouldn’t he fired me.

At a hobby group?

Keep in mind these are your true peers. That’s a good idea in essence. Just make sure that you are presenting yourself in the right light. I went out on a couple of dates with members of one of the groups I belong to. I invited a member to hang out. Just as friends, get to know each other. I wasn’t looking for an LTR; I was looking for a friend to compare notes with. He came over for dinner. Do you want to know when I realized he thought it was a date? When he kept sitting next to me. Or sitting on the floor by my side like a puppy. He couldn’t sit still and kept wanting to be beside me. I was confused. In person, he seemed very Alpha, very assertive and at one point I thought he was straight. I was wrong. He was very submissive and I didn’t know what to do with him. I tried to explain to him that I wasn’t looking for a pet. We still talk, but that’s it.

A Blind date?

Yeah. Here’s one that I want to meet. Most of the people that have set me up on a blind date have no idea what they’re setting me up for. I’m a bit fem to begin with and they set me up on a date with another fem guy. How do you tell them that you’re looking for the exact opposite of what they think you like? So I have agreed to a few of these blind dates. For one part I don’t want to be disrespectful to my friends and family. They do it out of love and care for my future. What I get a kick out of is the first date. We’re all friendly, talk about the weather. We make comments that are sweet about the people that brought us together. We talk a bit more to fill in the empty space in between bites and try to be courteous to them about how they are completely not our type or for that matter we don’t find them appealing. I’ve been with a few very hot guys with some great personalities, but I’m not they’re type. So we say our goodbyes, we lie to those who put us together and move on. Never to hear from them, or for that matter call them back.

Yes. I’m looking for an LTR. Any ideas? I would love to hear them.